The Cruise of the Condor

The Cruise of the Condor

Wednesday, 29 May 2013

Eye of the Buddha - Part 1

It’s 1933 and Ankh su Namun is seeking to reincarnate her lover, Dorstep, from the dead. Dorstep was executed by the then Pharaoh, Ramitin III in the 2nd century B.C. According to the Book of the Dead Ankh needs several artefacts to perform the ritual resurrection of her lover. She recruits some rather dodgy characters from the back streets of Alexandria to form the League of Quite Nasty People. Apparently one of the artefacts required is an enormous ruby which resides in a statue of Buddha serving as one of the statue’s eyes. In true original form, it is referred to as The Eye of the Buddha. An ancient document stolen from the Museum of Egyptian Antiquities in Cairo by Otto Einäugige points the League in the direction of British Honduras. So the League sets out………
Scene: sometime later in the steamy Honduran jungle.

The League of Quite Ordinary Archaeologists is exploring the Honduran jungle in the region of El Toy-Letdor, an area famed for its ancient Mayan temples. Although primarily a British expedition funded by the Bembridge Scholars, the League is led by the famous White Russian émigré, Countess Ripya Korzetov. Quite by chance, they stumble across an ancient Mayan temple and they decide to investigate….


The Eye of the Buddha, the main plot point…………….


By a strange coincidence which only script-writers can dream of, the League of Quite Nasty People is approaching the same location from a different direction! Ankh has now recruited a side-kick, Captain Aard B’Astaard picking him up in Port Royal after seeing him take on a mob of locals in a bar fight in the red light district. The rest of her allies are the aforementioned Otto Einäugige and Seldum Bin-Laid and Mustapha Goat.


The League of Quite Nasty People had the initiative at the start and forced the League of Quite Ordinary Archaeologists to activate first in order to divine their intentions. Doctor Gussie Finknottle made a dash for some interesting looking crates (stolen rocket pack) whilst Dame Hilda Rumpole went to investigate a pile of skulls (coded message). Countess Ripya Korzetov and her side-kick, Professor Algernon Cholmondley-Warner made straight for the temple. The Honourable ‘Barmy’ Fotheringay-Phipps moved off in a more easterly direction having sighted what looked like another archaeologist (drunken archaeologist with information) in the distance.


The League of Quite Nasty People also moved forward. Otto Einäugige went to look at a skull on a pole (crystal skull), Seldum Bin-Laid went west around the temple heading for the same wooden crates as Gussie Finknottle and Mustapha, Ankh and the Captain headed straight for the temple steps.


Neither of the opposing factions had actually spotted each other yet as the game moved into turn two. More fortune cards were drawn from the deck.


The League of Quite Nasty People still held the initiative and elected to activate first this turn having seen the other player’s intentions. Otto Einäugige stepped up to the skull on the pole and disturbed Porthidium nasutum hiding in the rocks at the foot of the pole. Otto failed to pass this peril (rolling double one!) and was bitten by the snake, more commonly known as the Hognose Viper.


Otto was down for this turn, writhing in agony at the foot of the crystal skull.


Ankh and the Captain moved forward at a run, straight up the temple steps followed by a puffing Mustapha who certainly was not used to this level of physical activity. Mustapha was instructed to retrieve the Eye of the Buddha from the statue whilst Ankh and Aard held off the archaelogists who they could now see heading towards them. They loosed off a shot each, but with the exertion of running up the steps their aim was off and both missed Ripya and Algy.


Seldum was also running towards the crates and Gussie Finknottle. Seeing that Gussie was in range he fired two shots from his Mark III Lee Enfield. Gussie was having as much luck as Otto with the dice and went down with two bullet wounds before he even had a chance to look inside the crates.


Dame Hilda cautiously put her hand into the pile of skulls, but not cautiously enough! As her hand touched the coded message, she set off a deadly needle trap which injected curare into her wrist. Dame Hilda was also down and in peril of her life.


Ripya and Algy walked to the foot of the steps to ensure a steadier aim and with the bonus for close range a hail of lead filled the air as they opened fire (Ripya was shooting 4d10+1 and Algy at 4d8+1!). ‘Barmy’ Fotheringay-Phipps had diverted from his original course and arrived at the temple from the east, getting off three shots from his service revolver at the Captain. The upshot of all this gunfire was that the Captain was hit several times but still standing (health reduced to d6) and Ankh, using her mystical powers made every health check!


During the recovery phase, Dame Hilda self-administered a hypodermic full of anti-curare serum (which she always carried in her handbag) and managed to stagger back to her feet. The indomitable Gussie Finknottle pulled himself upright bleeding from two wounds and prepared to re-join the fray. Otto was not so lucky. With no one on hand to suck out the snake venom he succumbed to the poison and was out of the game.


Seldum and Gussie were slogging it out over the crates containing the stolen rocket pack. Otto was apparently dead and Dame Hilda was trying to recover her wits. This left a furious gun fight on the temple itself whilst Mustapha, dodging bullets was now about to try and pry the Eye of the Buddha out of its socket.

To be continued…………………….

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